Joke of the Day

[Braveheart]

nice jokes

[DesertRose]

Till now you might have heard that clothes reflect ones personality.

Well now that fact is as old as pin tux.

Here's an interesting forward that claims to reveal your personality traits
according to the way you undress. So are you a pealer or a teaser?

Well, the way you undress might just help you discover yourself better.

Go on and indulge in self-exploration. Throw, dump, remove, just do your own
thing...


1. If you throw your clothes all over the place, you're a friendly,
life-of-the-party type. You are free with your thoughts and opinions, not
caring much about what others think of you.

Your parents might think your room looks like a cyclone's hit it? But it
actually represents your happy, individualistic nature! Stay that way!

2. If you remove each piece of clothing and put it away carefully, you are a
serious person who likes life to be very calm. You are comfortable with
routine work. And you believe that the best way to deal with life's problems
is to prevent them in the first place.

You are a perfectionist. By nature you are quite shy. You're dependable and
sometimes intense. You think carefully before making decisions. You go about
your tasks methodically, with concentration.

3.If you take off the shirt, and ten minutes later get around to the pants,
you are an extremely self-confident person. You are naturally bright and
intellectual.

You are also a deep thinker who loves to ask questions and ponder over the
meaning of things.

You hate being rushed and you do not like to be hassled. Usually you like a
lot of free time for yourself.

4.If you get out of your clothes as quickly as possible, you are
concerned about others and what they expect from you, but you're worried
about your own needs.

You are family-oriented, and stay extremely busy.

You often feel stressed, but most of those heavy expectations come from your
own head! Give yourself a break, you don't have to be perfect!

5.If you take off your rings, earrings, necklace, watch, etc before anything
else, you are a warm and sensitive person.

You are considerate and thoughtful, and you give good advice to your
friends. You are a natural born romantic.

Helping friends or anybody for that matter is your second nature. You hate
liars and you would love the world to become a better place.

6. If you don't have an undressing routine and you never do it the same way
twice, you are a very curious and interesting person. You enjoy a broad
range of activities. You take risks and enjoy fun and adventure.

The word monotony cannot dampen your spirits at any cost, as you live life
king-size. Having fun is as much a part of your routine as slogging it out
at office.

[Perozai R!nd]

Aik MEMON raat k khane k time par apnay bachon sai kehta hai k jo khana nahi khai ga usko 5 rupai milain gai sabh khana nahi khatai aur 5 rupai lai laitai hain subah nashtai k waqt MEMON phir bachon sai kehta hai k abh jo 5 rupai daiga usai nashta milaiga....  

[Perozai R!nd]

Hugli Hugli
Dugli DUgli
Bugli Bugli
Ugly Ugly Busssssssssssssss!!










Hans mut yeh mantar Rang KAALA karne ka tha jo tune parh liya.....










Ab tera kia hoga KAAALIYAAA....????

[Perozai R!nd]

Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says,
“My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, and they
give him $50.“

The second boy says, “That“s nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of
paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100.“

The third boy says, “I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece
of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!“

[Perozai R!nd]

BOY:sorry main tumse shaadi nahin kar sakta gharwale mana kar rahai hain
GIRL: ghar main kon kon hai ?
BOY:1 BIWI aur 3 bachay  

[Perozai R!nd]

Kya kabhi 1 aur 1 = 5 ho sakte hain.????

bilkul ho sakte hain

batao kaise

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Galti se

Ha ha ha ha 

[Mahnaaz]

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"

The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".

[Rind Baba]

Daughter's Prayer   
 
A family was having some people to dinner. At the table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, "Dear, would you like to say the blessing?"
"I wouldn't know what to say," replied the little girl, shyly.

"Just say what you hear Mommy say, sweetie," the woman said.

Her daughter took a deep breath, bowed her head, and solemnly said, "Dear Lord, why the hell did I invite all these people to dinner!?!"
 

[Nuno]

there's a new chinese diet out--
" eat all you want, but you are allowed only one chopstick"

[Perozai R!nd]

A little boy asked his father

"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"

And the father replied,

"I don't know son, I'm still paying".

[Deedag]

~~ MUNNABHAI JOKES ~~

PRINCIPAL:
Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya toh first time 100 Rs fine, 2nd time 200 Rs. Fine and 3rd time 500.

MUNNA BHAI:
Monthly paas ka kya lega Mamu?

-------------------------------------------------------
CIRCUIT:
Oye Short Circuit yeh light bulb pe baap ka naam kya likh raha hai?

SHORT CIRCUIT:
Apun baap ka naam roshan kar rehla hai

-------------------------------------------------------------
MAMU:
Oye, maar gayay yaar. Meri biwi aur premika saath saath aa rehla hai.

MAMU KA DOST:
Arrey, mein bhi yehi bolnewala tha

-----------------------------------------------------------------
MUNNA BHAI:
Mamu, tu kitna pada hai?

MAMU:
B.A.

MUNNA BHAI:
Sala, two akshar pada aur woh bhi ulta?

--------------------------------------------------------------------
MUNNA BHAI:
Mamu, apun bachpan mein dus maley ke building se gir gaya tha.

MAMU:
Aarey, phir kya hua. Bach gaya ki tapak gaya?

MUNNA BHAI:
Yaad nehin hai yaar. Bahut purane baat hai.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
CIRCUIT:
Aye Mamu, tereko papar aur jhapar mein pharak pata hai kya?

MAMU:
Nehin.

CIRCUIT:
To kha ke dekh le, pata chal jayega.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MUNNA BHAI:
Circuit, bole toh yeh Ford kya hai?

CIRCUIT:
Bhai, gaadi hai.

MUNNA BHAI:
Toh phir, yeh Oxford kya hai?

CIRCUIT:
Bole toh, simple hai bhai, Ox mane Bael, Ford mane gaadi. Oxford bole toh Baelgaadi.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PROFESSOR:
Akal bari ki bhains?

MUNNA BHAI:
Bole toh pehlay date of birth bata mamu.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MAMU:
Bhai, apnay ko char mahinay mein Tamil sikhna padega. Kuch upay batao.

MUNNA BHAI:
Kannada kyun, aur char mahinay ka kya chakkar hai?

MAMU:
Meinay ek Tamil baccha adopt kiya hai, aur woh char mahinay mein bolne lagay ga.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
CIRCUIT:
Bhai, woh apnay bachpan ka dost aarehla aaj raat ko dinner pe. Mera sara chain collection apnay kamray mein chupa do na please.

MUNNABHAI:
Kyun tera dost chor hai kya?

CIRCUIT:
Nehin Bhai, woh apnay chain pechan lega.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MAMU:
Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai, aaj din mein kaise nikal aya?

GIRL:
Ullu to raat ko bolta hai, aaj din mein kaise bol para?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
CIRCUIT:
Bhai, Bapu ne bola tha ke kabhi jhoot nehin bolna mangta hai. Apun aaj se kabhi jhoot nehin bolega Bhai.

MUNNA BHAI:
Aye Circuit, woh Sunita ka baap aya hai terayko dund rehla hai.

CIRCUIT:
Bhai usko bolo apun gaon gaya hai, kheti karneko.

MUNNA BHAI:
Par Circuit, abhi to tu bola kabhi jhoot nehin bolega.

CIRCUIT:
Bhai, apun jhoot nehin bolega, par tum to bol sakta hai na.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PROFESSOR:
Gandhi Jayanti ke baray mein kya jantey ho?

MUNNA BHAI:
Gandhi bahut jabardast aadmi tha, Baap. Maa Kasam, par apun ko yeh nehin malum ke yeh Jayanti kaun hai.

[Nuno]

A punjabi went to hajj and  he was praying.
"Aye Allah tera ghar kitni barkaton wala,  or rehmatoon wala hai,
Aye alah tery ghar main kitna sukoon hai or yeah kitna Ammn wala hai.
Lekin .........lahore lahore hai"

[زینوک Zenok]

Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?
Operator: Yes, you can speak to me.
Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can
speak to me. Who is this?
Caller: I'm Sam Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's
urgent.
Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone!
But what's this urgent matter about?
Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe
Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe
Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his
way to the hospital.
Operator: Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the
hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find
this hilarious but I don't have time for this!
Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?
Operator: I'm Saw Ree.
Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your
name!!
Operator: That's what I said. I'm Saw Ree

[Perozai R!nd]

Husband asks, Do you know the meaning of WIFE.
It means...Without Information Fighting Everytime!
WIFE satys No, it means -
With Idiot for Ever.